Kategorie: Body Positive

The Mental Bikini Body

by Asta Nowarra on / Body Positive

I am more than happy to have found 2 incredible girls who create new ideas with me about Body positivity and plus size fashion!
Julia & Jasmin from Les Soeurs Shop in Berlin, the first german concept store by the way, are creative, lovely, fun to work and drink with and most importantly : always up for new ideas!
(as I´m writing this I took over their store while they went to an order meeting 😉 )
Now as we established that those 2 cuties are true gems, I just wanted to share some pictures from the beginning of May, where i was giving a lecture about my own personal way to body positivity, cooperating with Les Soeurs Shop!

12 wonderful women and 1 very special man ( felix my best friend) joined me for champagne and snacks to hear me sharing my ups and downs as a fat gitl.
Takling about struggling as a fat kid in school, your first crush, being rejected and what it can do to a person to be rejected because of their weight, tips on how to work on a better body image, a better relationship to your own body and how I started my blog.
And it wouldn´t be an evening with me without talking about sex – of course 😀

Tiffany from Wundercurves also joined us and made some wonderful pictures!! Thanks girl – I´m happy to see you any time!!

In case one of you guys is interested in joining the discussion or is just looking for some comfort by hearing that someone else went through the same things, had the same fears and doubts or is looking for some inspiration in any way – just hit me up and me and Les Soeurs Shop will repeat this wonderful and emotional happening!!

Here some pictures (all pictures taken by Tiffany from Wundercurves )

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Fat Girls and Music Videos

by Asta Nowarra on / Body Positive

Early february this year, I was asked to be part of a music Video (thanks Tanja from Kurvenrausch Model Agency for suggesting me )

And as I´m a fat confident girl with tons of swagger – everyone knows – exactly what they ( and by THEY I mean the band The BossHoss and the Berlin based production company Katapult Movieproductions ) were looking for! After sending the production company a short video of me dancing in underwear to Justin Timberlake´s „Senorita“, which was obviously good enough to get the part, I went to the outfit fitting on a relatively sunny sunday morning.
Meeting the band,the manager and the director, trying on different styles and opening eyes to how difficult it is to find outfits for plus size models, was super interresting and fun!
The next morning however, I woke up with the biggest cold sore Ive had ÍN YEARS – mind you I haven´t had any in years – but of course the day before the video shoot 😀
Luky me, we´ve had the best make up artists ever, so with a ton of foundation, patches and what not, we managed to hold that lip broccoly down 😀
The video shoot was just amazing! I was super happy to find out quite early that 2 of my plus size gal pals where part of the video too : Christine Wolke and Dominique Esterlich Those two funny babes really made the long day of dancing, twerking, sweating, laughing and talking weird stuff, very special!
So If you wanna see me and my homegirls shaking out asses, washing a horse, me riding a rocket and poledancing, then just check out this crazy video by The BossHoss called I LIKE IT LIKE THAT(international) and I LIKE IT LIKE THAT(germany)
Yes! fat girls are sexy too !

here some behind the scenes pictures / Behind the scenes video:
ILILT Behind the scenes
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My Body – My Rules

by Asta Nowarra on / Body Positive

You have every right to not be attracted to my body but you also have the right ( and I personally ask you to use this right) to not comment on my body in any negative way what so ever and just scroll on.
Cause you have no right to express your opinion on something you don’t know nothing about.

Y’all haters don’t know my journey that lead up to this picture, y’all don’t have no clue how much effort I had to put into coming this far. And by „this far“ I mean not feeling the pressure of changing for anyone who 1. doesn’t accept me the way I am – inside and out and 2. who can’t accept themselves and therefore tries to shame ppl who actually love themselves.
Believe it or not – more ppl that you think ( and especially guys – even if you don’t want that to be true) are attracted to my body including myself.
No I have no problems in my sexlife and I actually really enjoy it, as well as my partner!
Just because you may not like the way I look or how I present myself doesn’t mean my world will stop spinning and the good part is – you’re not part of my world!
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Food-Fiasco

by Asta Nowarra on / Body Positive

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Since I remember I´ve had this big issue about eating something in front of people.

There was this time, I guess I was about 4 or 5 years old, where my grandparents invited a friend for dinner and I couldn´t eat although I was almost starving (well – it felt like 😉 ) – so, after dinner, I sat in the kitchen on my own and I was finally able to eat.
This habbit ran like a common thread through my life and became a big problem, because it was also a struggle for me to eat something in front of my boyfriends at that time or someone I liked, I couldn´t go out for breakfasts with the family or friends, brunch including a buffet was impossible for me to handle and at some point of time even grocery shopping started being uncomfortable.
Although I was being hungry like hell and my tummy was noticeable rumbling, I just picked something small to eat ( maybe a small salad or just a banana at the supermarket ) when I saw that I was not the only one eating or shopping there.
At a certain point I started not just feeling hungry but also being frustrated, because I was so disappointed, mad and angry at myself for not being able to think „FUCK OFF!!! I´m gonna eat a pizza and a chocolate brownie whenever I WANT TO!

I felt like everyone was watching me while I was eating, while I put food on my plate at the buffet, while I ordered my meal at a fast food restaurant or while I just put my grocery on the cash desk.
Being creative I also started creating some cover-stories every time I ordered something at a fast food restaurant – I acted like my friend/collegue or anyone else gave me their order too, so I took a piece of paper and wrote down my order, I went to the counter and read it to the cashier – sometimes I added an „oh .. I dont know, just make it a coke, because I´m not sure what he wants to drink“ just to sound convincing…

Each time I finished my little „play“ and came home to eat, I felt more and more like a fool. Like an idiot who´s not even able to order food! I was just to scared what people might think of me when they see me eating or buying my grocery. Those people, which I either barely knew or most of the time not at all, stuck in my head, it kept me from something essential and from something everyone just should enjoy!

During a therapy in 2011 I learned to deal with this topic the hard way : like a shock-therapy I was being forced to go out – to buy something to eat (like a burger or a pretzel) and not just eat it in front of people but additionally to make eye-contact while eating my food! the worst thing I could imagine!

But nothing happened! No one cared about what I ate, how I ate it and what I was doing there! It really was a big relief – like something heavy was taken off my shoulders and something delicious was put into my tummy 😉

What I mainly learned from this whole eating-trip was, that you should not care about what other people might say or think!!

You should not forbid yourself to enjoy something ( as long as it doesn´t hurt anyone ), to wear something you find pretty, to look like you want to look or to eat what you want to eat, as long as you treat yourself and your body with respect and health!

Other peoples opinions ´mean nothing because they are not living your life, they don´t know what you´ve been through and where you want to go.

 

STAY POSITIVE – at least try your best <3

love

Asta

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SELF-CONFIDENCE sunday

by Asta Nowarra on / Body Positive

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First things first : not everyone is as selfconfident as it may seem!

It is sunday and to be honest I didn´t feel to well the last days. I know everyone has those days of being in doubts with yourself, your appearance, your choices in life and what you have accomplished so far. I bet even Ella Fitzgerald had those issues 😉
Most people I know or who think knew me, are absolutely convinced that I´m a burst of convidence, fun, good jokes ( I consider myself as a hilarious joke teller and I have proof 😀 ) and positivity.
Well – I am not!
At least not all the time!

Like everyone else I sometimes overthink situations, I sometimes feel like I haven´t accomplished anything in my life so far, I am lovesick like everyone else, probably even more than usual because I´m not the luckiest one when it comes to dates or relationships, but my point is: I do have issues and I do suffer like the rest of you. Maybe in different situations, maybe over different things but the feeling is something we share.

The main thing I´ve leraned over the past couple years and especially months is :

Most of the insecurities you´re carrying around with you is due to other people ( narrow mind/sight of view, bullying, having insecurities themselves) AND because you tend to compare yourself to others!

But comparing yourself to Kate Moss or Dita van Teese won´t bring you very far because you will stop figuring out WHO YOU ARE!

It´s important to have rolemodels but try not to forget what feels good for yourself, what makes you happy, what makes you creative and how you create your own little comfortzone.
Out of experience I know that treating yourself in a respectful and caring way is always a good start of loving yourself. Little things like taking a long shower or bath, listening to your favorite music, putting on some lotion and to come to grips with yourself is an easy step to feel yourself.

Feeling yourself is one of the basic ingredients to more self-confidence because when you know who your are, how you feel and how to find back to yourself in situations where you feel kind of lost and overwhelmed, your world won´t be shattered completely if something bad happens.

Find something you can do, that makes you happy and preferably something that invoves you and your body because that will support the bonds you´ll need to gain more confidence. I personally start doing some nice make up, take my time, meanwhile listening to some good music and have a little photo-shoot by myself and in case I don´t even feel like getting up, I grab a paper and pen to write all the shit down that is circling around inside my head. reding it after some days will remind you of how you coped  this situation, which is also a great success!

Write down the things you already succeeded! Like for example the difficult test at school or living in a different city all by yourself, your family management, how you solved a problem by yourself ( even without asking Google 😉 ) or the jobinterview that went well! Do not forget the little things because every single day there is some small success – you just need to find it!

With all this in your mind, have a confident sunday and try to bond with yourself step by step

<3  love,

Asta

 

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